The 14 Phases Of Summer Vacation.
“Because summer vacation is a journey, not an event.” – Ghandi or Churchill or Lincoln. Maybe Marilyn Monroe. Who cares?
1. Stunned Disbelief.
No. Finals cannot be almost over. My blood is 45% caffeine, 45% self-hatred and 10% repressed tears. Summer will never come. Ever.
2. The Buildup.
Because counting down the last week of school in seconds is totally normal, amirite? Only 604,799 left to go …
3. The. First. Day.
FREE AT LAST. Thank GOD ALMIGHTY, free AT LAST!
4. The Honeymoon Phase.
OMG. FRIENDS THAT I DON’T HAVE TO STUDY WITH. PARTIES THAT AREN’T SOLELY FOR THE POINT OF FORGETTING FINALS WEEK. SLEEP.
5. Trouble in Paradise.
I mean, sure, dad has told that story a million times. AND I just remembered that I never really liked a lot of my old high-school friends. But hey, SUMMER!
You know what, if I just drop the old friends and refocus myself, it will all be great. I have three months to better myself.
7. Or Nah.
You know what, pettiness and disillusionment is actually pretty darn satisfying.
AKA, the entire month of July. All friends have been hung out with, you have eliminated your sleep deficit and dad REALLY needs to stop with the old stories.
9. Even More Boredom.
Watching every season of Game of Thrones, Scandal, Orange is the New Black and Breaking Bad. Twice. Only a whole ‘nother month to go.
10. CRIPPLING Boredom.
HOW DID I EVER LIKE ANY OF THESE PEOPLE?! WERE MY PARENTS ALWAYS THIS BAD?! TOO. MUCH. FREE. TIME.
Early august. Only three weeks until I can see my friends again!
12. Reality Check.
Wait … but homework, tho …
13. Bracing Oneself.
School supplies: Bought.Outfits: planned.Basic bitches: Put on notice.
14. Back to School.
VIVE LA STRUGGLE!