Community Post: 20 Things You Should Probably Have Stopped Doing By Now

1. Singing the ‘ABC’ song whenever you need to alphabetise something

I guess it’s good to use something I learned when I was 3, but I’m pretty sure I shouldn’t be

2. Fixing things just enough to stop them breaking right this second

Lionsgate / Via

If there’s no water coming out, it’s fixed. Pouring water, that is. Dripping is fine.

3. Cracking up as soon as you’re not allowed to laugh

NBC / Via

Big meeting? Solemn remembrance? Friend having life-changing epiphany and re-assessing every action they’ve ever taken? CLASSIC COMEDY.

4. Hitting ‘Reply All’ on an email accidentally

BBC / Via

Somehow, it only happens when you’ve gone really snarky with a response

5. Ordering in take-out, despite having time and food to cook with

BRB, getting Pizza

6. Zoning out without realising you’re actually staring at someone

Columbia / Via

They’re either uncomfortable that you’re trying to flirt, or uncomfortable that you don’t function in human society.

It’s the second one.

7. Having ‘just one more drink’

One ≠ one

8. Using any sort of internet slang IRL


9. Screwing up a handshake/high five/fist bump/any sort of greeting

We should have talked about it first. That would have been less awkward.

10. Using a North West South East mnemonic to figure out which subway train you should be getting

If they’d start putting more useful destinations on the signs it might help. Who knows where a train ends up?

11. Not being able to at least fake the ability to play sports

The key is always being far away from the ball, but very vocal about your desire to be near to the ball

12. Using a terrible comeback

NBC / Via

And using it late. Very late.

13. Wearing incredibly impractical clothes for the purposes of fashion

FX / Via

It’s possible they don’t actually look that good anyway

14. Spending too much time on the internet

FOX / Via

3AM at a keyboard is the new 11PM at a party

15. Bad flirting

DreamWorks / Via

Talking is hard

16. Forgetting other peoples names

Or at least, not being able to bluff until someone else says it

17. Forgetting how to spell basic words

Actually, pretty much any words. There’s nothing worse than when spellcheck can’t even work out what you’re trying to say.

18. Being distracted by your phone while out in the world

College Humour / Via

Trees aside, you should probably just talk to people

19. Insisting on your own awesomeness in the face of all evidence

Keep quiet about how awesome you are instead, and let other people tell you so you can fake being humble

20. Giving up easily

The CW / Via

When you start something new, the easiest option is to quit, but first you should try really, really hard to hit your goals. Then bail if it still doesn’t work. No point in wasting time.

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