22 Delusional Thoughts All People In Los Angeles Have

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Lost in Angeles.

1. “I’ll worry about parking when I get there.”

22 Delusional Thoughts All People In Los Angeles Have

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Paramount Pictures / Via reddit.com

Reality: Worry about it now because there AIN’T GONNA BE ANY PARKING.

2. “I know what to do during an earthquake.”

22 Delusional Thoughts All People In Los Angeles Have

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KTLA / Via reddit.com

Reality: “HOLY FUCK IS THIS AN EARTHQUAKE?!?!! WHAT DO I DO?!?!?@!@#@!#@”

3. “I’ll start the [insert ridiculous juice cleanse and/or diet] tomorrow.”

22 Delusional Thoughts All People In Los Angeles Have

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shiftgig.com

Reality: It will always be “tomorrow.” The power of gluten is both satanic and irresistible.

4. “There shouldn’t be much traffic at this time of day.”

22 Delusional Thoughts All People In Los Angeles Have

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digg.com

Reality: THERE’S ALWAYS TRAFFIC.

5. “It totally looks like it’s gonna rain!”

"It totally looks like it’s gonna rain!"

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Creative Commons / Via Flickr: infinitewilderness

Reality: NOPE. Just smog.

6. “I’ll be there in 20 minutes!”

22 Delusional Thoughts All People In Los Angeles Have

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NBC / Via gifsfln.tumblr.com

Reality: Marina del Rey at this hour? Stuart, not on your life.

7. “I’ll wake up to move my car before street cleaning.”

"I’ll wake up to move my car before street cleaning."

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windowsarerolleddown.wordpress.com

Reality: You’ll wake up to another parking ticket.

8. “This shortcut is going to cut my driving time IN HALF.”

22 Delusional Thoughts All People In Los Angeles Have

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MTV / Via imgarcade.com

Reality: Doubled your driving time.

9. “The beach is going to be so relaxing today.”

"The beach is going to be so relaxing today."

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Creative Commons / Via Flickr: environmentblog

Reality: Lol.

10. “Runyon shouldn’t be too crowded right now.”

22 Delusional Thoughts All People In Los Angeles Have

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Warner Bros. Pictures / Via fanpop.com

Reality: I NEED TO GET AWAY FROM ALL THESE PEOPLE AND THEIR DAMN DOGS.

11. “I’m going to start buying my coffee from only local cafes.”

22 Delusional Thoughts All People In Los Angeles Have

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says-me.tumblr.com

Reality: Your Starbucks triple, venti, half sweet, non-fat, caramel macchiato is calling.

12. “I think I’ll go for a run today.”

22 Delusional Thoughts All People In Los Angeles Have

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runnermotivation.tumblr.com

Reality: HELL NO. IT’S HOT AND POLLUTED.

13. “In-N-Out should be a quick lunch.”

22 Delusional Thoughts All People In Los Angeles Have

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youtube.com

Reality: Shorter lines at Disneyland.

14. “I’m going to watch my carbon footprint and take the subway.”

"I'm going to watch my carbon footprint and take the subway."

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commons.wikimedia.org

Reality: You’re not about to give up the convenience of your car to learn confusing subway routes.

15. “It’s so warm out today, I won’t need a jacket.”

22 Delusional Thoughts All People In Los Angeles Have

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Via evilbeetgossip.com

Reality: Until the sun goes down and you need your North Face.

16. “I only buy food from Trader Joe’s. I’m so healthy.”

"I only buy food from Trader Joe's. I'm so healthy."

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Creative Commons / Via Flickr: meginsanity

Reality: Two words: Cookie Butter.

17. “My car is so shitty.”

"My car is so shitty."

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Creative Commons / Via Flickr: jurvetson

Reality: Just because it’s not a Tesla, THERE’S NOTHING WRONG WITH YOUR 2014 NISSAN ALTIMA.

18. “This wheatgrass shot will fill me up for lunch.”

22 Delusional Thoughts All People In Los Angeles Have

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blog.relay.im

Reality: Fuck the juice cleanse, YOU NEED PIZZA.

19. “I should buy warm clothes for the winter.”

22 Delusional Thoughts All People In Los Angeles Have

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VH1 / Via hercampus.com

Reality: Oops, still 72 and sunny.

20. “I know my way around, I don’t need my GPS anymore.”

22 Delusional Thoughts All People In Los Angeles Have

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20th Century Fox / Via gifbay.com

Reality: “How the fuck did I end up in Koreatown?”

21. “OMG I JUST SAW BRITNEY SPEARS!”

22 Delusional Thoughts All People In Los Angeles Have

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MTV / Via mtv.tumblr.com

Reality: Nope. Just a “Real Housewife” of Beverly Hills. (But still meltdown-worthy).

22. “I’ll settle down somewhere else one day.”

22 Delusional Thoughts All People In Los Angeles Have

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Via love-lust-and-dreams.tumblr.com

Reality: You’ll never be able to leave this City of Angels.

Read more: http://buzzfeed.com/christianzamora/delusional-thoughts-you-have-in-la

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